The most irksome, nasty, peevish, and stingy negotiator in creation resides between your two ears.
It's you, and of course, it's me, too.
We are our own worst enemies in a negotiation because we fall into five negotiating traps:
(1) We remain in our own heads instead of seeing the world from our counterpart's viewpoint. As I demonstrate in the "Best Practices in Negotiation" class I teach at U.C. Berkeley extension and elsewhere, ferreting out the other party's options and opinions pays off, nicely.
(2) We fail to set negotiating goals before entering a negotiation. Fred had his eye on a new grand piano, and after doing his research he boiled his choices down to two: a Suzuki and a Yamaha. He called and visited lots of Yamaha dealers but they were hesitant to discount the model he wanted. The Suzuki, reportedly a fine instrument as well, wasn't in the same class, but Fred was willing to settle for it, mostly because it priced out twenty percent less than its rival. Still not convinced he wanted the Suzuki, Fred happened upon a one-day sale of Yamaha's at Costco, and noting the price was discounted by about two thousand dollars from what he had seen at dealers, instantly, he bought the model he wanted.
What does this have to do with negotiation? Fred got them to throw in free delivery and set-up, but apart from that, he simply accepted the price as offered. Still, he negotiated with HIMSELF the terms he wanted most. He wanted a Yamaha at a slightly higher price than a Suzuki, and when he found that deal, exactly, he grabbed it. He had already established their relative values, but more significantly, he had determined their respective values to him. Some retail prices, i.e. "sale" prices, are great and being prepared to snatch them when they come along is what smart negotiators do.
(3) We're impatient. Instead of starting with the presumption that "No deal is better than a bad one," we endorse the concept that "Some deal is better than none." Be willing to walk away, and establish what your walk-away price is, in advance.
(4) We dislike negotiating, believing it is "beneath us." That is a prescription for failure, because in many cultures negotiating is promoted and perfectly normal, and in some it appears insulting to NOT be willing to bargain, at least a little.
(5) We endow other people's prices as fair, objective and scientifically derived. Pricing is more of an art than a science and most pricing errs on the side of packing in too much profit, instead of too little. So, there's "water" in most prices and our job as smart negotiators is to flush it out.