Negotiating means bargaining, give-and-take - and striking a deal that leaves all parties to a transaction happy with the outcome!
Bargaining touches all aspects of life, from the kids promising to be quiet during your television programme in exchange for an increase in pocket money, to the boss offering an extra day off to any employee willing to take his place at a forthcoming seminar.
Negotiating is a two-way process between parties who bargain until a middle point - a compromise - is reached which leaves everyone happy. So what's involved?
Whoever you're bargaining with, there are ways to spin the odds in your favor; subtle techniques that can make all the difference between getting what you want and being dissatisfied with a deal. This is the lowdown...
BE PREPARED
Make sure you know exactly what you want to achieve before you enter negotiations. Work out how best to achieve it. This means knowing something about the other party, what they want from negotiations and what they are likely to ask for. It also means deciding - in advance - what concessions you can afford to make without thwarting your primary objectives.
AIM HIGH
Enter negotiations willing to accept a little and that is exactly what you will get. At best! Go in asking for MORE than you want, trade the less desirable elements, and leave the room with exactly what you wanted in the first place.
RANK YOUR OBJECTIVES
These can be divided up into different categories. 'Musts'. These are what you really want from the deal. These will not be conceded. 'Ideals'. These are not quite as important as musts, but they are things you'd really like to achieve just the same. These might be conceded but only if the price is right. 'Loss Leaders'. These are things you are prepared to trade in exchange for things you really want from the negotiating table.
KNOW THE OTHER PARTY
Ideally, you should be able to identify what the other party wants - and then work out how they are likely to rank these wants as 'musts', 'ideals' and 'loss leaders'. This puts you in a position to swop their loss leaders for your musts or ideals. Trading loss leaders is usually pointless, unless the other party thinks you are making a greater concession!
USE SILENCE TO DEVASTATING EFFECT
Most people hate silence, especially in the middle of negotiations. Used cleverly, silence can make the other party feel uncomfortable - even to the point where that person will concede something they don't really want to lose!
EVALUATE THE NEGOTIATIONS
If you summaries the essential points of negotiations so far - and do this out loud - it will help to clear things in your mind and ensure the other party understands your views.
MAKE NOTES
This helps you focus on your objectives and stops you being side-tracked. Notes can be invaluable, especially if the other party tries to change course. You can say, "But earlier you said ...What has changed since then?" This approach throws less experienced opponents off balance, and puts the negotiations in your favor.
BOLSTER THE OTHER PARTY'S EGO
Remember, successful negotiations leaves both parties walking away happy.