Negotiations
Training
When
Things Head South:
Deescalating Conflict
During a Negotiation
There are a
whole hosts of reasons as to why conflict
may come up during a negotiation. In some cases, conflict is
inherently part of a discussion. For example, negotiations between
a labor union and a corporation are often rife with conflict. Each
side often takes glaringly opposite positions with one side or the
other playing the role of the "immobile rock" unwilling
to compromise on key positions. Other
negotiations begin in an amicable manner but slowly or suddenly,
depending on the situation, deteriorate to the point where agreement
looks unlikely.
Conflict often
is born from miscommunication,
false assumptions or perception. Before a negotiation takes place,
each party needs to focus on making their interests
and positions as clear as possible. Ensuring that the other
party has a clear picture of where you stand will help eliminate
a great deal of conflict. Spending a sufficient amount of time preparing
for a negotiation to understand the other side's concerns can
also alleviate prevent conflict as dangerous or touchy subjects
can be avoided or handled "gingerly." There are times
when no amount of preparation or communication will avoid
conflict. In those cases, we suggested the following tips to
deescalate
conflict:
* Use Empathy
- It helps to place oneself in the other party's shoes to understand
the source of conflict or concern. Understanding the factors that
influence feelings and positions can lead to breakthroughs in conflict
resolution.
* Practice
Active Listening - It's one thing to "hear" what the
other party... it is better to truly "listen" to the other
party. Process what is being said. Don't focus on what you're going
to say. Understand their point before you can work towards resolution.
Active listening also includes confirmation of the message being
sent. Don't be afraid to ask for clarification or for a point to
be repeated. If conflict is an issue, you want to ensure that their
message is getting through clearly.
* Start Small
- When various areas of disagreement come up, focus on the "easy"
roadblocks first and build towards the tougher issues. This will
help build positive momentum
and goodwill to resolve more .complicated matters
* Table
Tough Issues - If you get stuck on a particular issue, table
it and move on to other areas. Don't let one out of ten items derail
your discussions. Sometimes "sleeping on it" really does
work.
* Be
Firm on Goals, Flexible on Solutions - This is a key premise.
You can utilize creativity to resolve areas of disagreement without
compromising your goals. Stand pat on what you need to accomplish
while looking for alternative
methods to reach your objectives.
* Take a Break
- Calling a timeout is a helpful way to calm elevated
emotions and bring focus back to the negotiating table. Most
people will appreciate the willingness to step away to take a breather.
It shows an understanding of the current conflict and a willingness
to let each side
calm down to get back on track.
* Watch for
Egos - Don't embarrass the other party - the results will derail
talks.
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