Negotiations Training

What to Avoid During Negotiations:
Roadblocks to Successful Negotiating

Some people have a hard time grasping the concept of principled negotiations. Reared in the so-called "school of knocks", they see a negotiation as a battle rather than an opportunity to collaborate towards agreement. They focus on domination and look to conquer rather than partner with the other party. It has been quite some time since this negotiation style has fallen out of favor. Oddly, there are still many that fall back into old habits and do what they can to make negotiations an arduous and stressful process.

We don't believe negotiations should be stressful. If handled in the right manner, they can be very positive experiences that enable both parties, regardless of their situation, to benefit tremendously. It is perfectly reasonable for each party to be able to walk away from the negotiating table and say, "you know, I think that went well. We gave them a fair deal and we got a pretty good deal, too." Many negotiations end this way? Some don't. Why? It's because some people continue to put up some of the following roadblocks that will hinder success and satisfaction:

Roadblock #1 - Seeking to Dominate the Other Party
Some negotiators don't care about who or what gets hurt along the way. They simply want to get the best deal while crushing their "opponent". In a negotiation, you don't have to always have a winner and a loser. It is possible for both parties to walk away from the table as winners. The best approach is to approach the table with the desire to find a mutually beneficial outcome.

Roadblock #2 - Taking Things Personally
It's important to understand that a negotiation is all about business. It is always wise to separate the people from those issues being discussed. If the other party is upset about the way a negotiation is proceeding, you need to remind yourself that the issue is not you... it is the negotiation. Keep emotions away from the negotiating table. The best approach is to keep an even-keeled temperament and to not get personally wrapped up in a negotiation.

Roadblock #3 - Pointing Fingers
One surefire way to derail a negotiation is to start pointing fingers when a negotiation goes awry. No one like to get blame for a problem. Pointing fingers puts the other party on the defensive and can turn a collaborative negotiator into an adversarial negotiator. Avoid laying blame at someone's feet. You may be just as guilty as they are.

Roadblock #4 - Negotiating with Blinders
Many people are so focused on what they want and what they have to have that they fail to look at the other party's situation. We've all heard the saying about walking a mile in someone else's shoes. It certainly applies to negotiations. Find out what is of concern to the other party and what might be at stake. Understanding their motivations may put their actions into perspective.

Roadblock #5 - Losing the Attitude Battle
Far too many people approach the negotiation table with a bad attitude. They may not like the situation or the other person and are ready to duke it out. Adjust your attitude. As mentioned before, negotiations should be viewed as opportunities, not fights.